to leave or not

leave findagrave???? That is the question.

For the past few months, I have been not so much disappointed but confused about findagrave and how it fits into my beliefs in the site and how it is run.

I have tried for about 6 months now to have 2 different different memorials moved to the correct cemeteries and the wrong cemeteries deleted. Nothing has happened — I followed the rules – sent in the SAC to each person – even telling them the plot in the correct cemetery that the person was in so they could put in a ew photo request at the correct cemetery.

I put the information in the Cemetery Fix-It Thread to have the cemeteries deleted.

Nothing has happened on anything so if I see an error, I ignore it because they don’t seem to get corrected. And if you try through the forums – well, let’s say I would never tell anyone to go there, they will destroy people. Well, ok, not destroy but some can be nasty while others are wonderful.

And photo requests – people just want the photos for their ancestry accounts – which wouldn’t be bad if they gave credit to the person that takes the photo and if they also updated the memorial on findagrave. But most I have found just take the photos and leave. Then there is the ones that you take the photo, post it and then they ask for permission to take the photo. Why not be upfront about it — give me the choice of whether or not I want to take it for another site.

And please, asking me to do research as to where someone else might be buried or to look around the cemetery for others. I will look around and if there is more than one person in that plot or the plot next to them, then yes, I take all the photos but to want me to check a 100,000+ cemetery for your people.

Then there are the ones that don’t have plot locations and I give them the contact of the cemetery to get the plot locations and they don’t – I am not asking you to call long distance but just email them. And I know the email works because the other people did and got the information and their photos within 2 weeks as I had the plot numbers.

Or there is the ones that put that they contact the cemetery and there is a headstone, but don’t put in the plot information. What is with that? Why not put in the information??

So, I am slowly transferring away all my memorials that are not family or important people to me to findagrave and going back to just doing my family.

Now, I may on some days, go and mow a few rows but Photo Requests no more.

So, will I leave – it is a 75/25 thing – 75% of me wants to stay because of the people that are doing it correctly, are friendly and have helped me in the past BUT the 25% make me want to throw in the towel and ask them to remove everything in my name but then some of that information is only there and I don’t want to loose it.

sigh – life or death is never easy!

Meeting a new Distant Cousin

You all know how I do findagrave for help in finding the burial locations of distant family members. Well, I had helped a woman with family here in BC and she noticed that I was looking for family headstone in Maple Ridge Cemetery, Chesterville, Ontario.

Shirley H, went above and beyond in getting photos not only for the people I had listed, but adding others as well. She didn’t have to, but she transferred these family members to me to look after and maintain. She is one of the reasons that I haven’t totally abandoned findagrave, but that is another post.

With my having the memorials in my name, I received a Suggest a Correction on Vivien Goyne Beach says that my Mother died shortly after giving birth to me and I was raised by my Grandparents. I emailed her and thanked her for the information and said that I guessed we were distantly related as her father, Norman Beach is my 3 x cousin 3 times removed.

She emailed back and said it was great to find another relative and that she loved finding all the Beaches on findagrave as her daughter was flying out from —- ready for this — Vancouver!!!! I was like WoW! I live in Burnaby, had she been to MountainView to see the Beaches buried there. We also talked about exchanging info, she has some pictures. But I never heard from her, it happens.

But 2 days ago, I got an email from her daughter, Nancy who is going to Ontario this week, coming back next week and would love to meet.

So, sometime in the next few weeks, I will be meeting my 5 x cousin once removed – I think this is the most distant, yet closely living relative that I will have ever met up with.

So, thank you to Shirley, findagrave and the internet!!!!